


In All But A Name

by cyfarwydd



Category: Misfits
Genre: Angst, Ghosts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-16
Updated: 2011-09-16
Packaged: 2017-10-23 18:57:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/253795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyfarwydd/pseuds/cyfarwydd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A name can change everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In All But A Name

At first, Nathan doesn't realize that Barry is dead. He doesn't realize that Barry isn't Simon.

It takes him a couple of weeks to figure it all out. Barry came first, he always did. After the storm had passed and he'd been a fucking homeless, wandering the streets like the delinquent he was, calling all his useless mates who rejected him turn after turn, he'd given into a rare moment of melancholy and sat on the side of the road, head in his hands. 

It couldn't have been more than a minute before he felt a strange feeling, like he was being watched, and he confirmed it when he glanced up and saw the creepy kid from the community center staring at him, hands shoved in his pockets. 

"Oi, what the hell are you doing here tosser! Bet you just love checking out my fine arse when I'm all down and out and defenseless, I bet that's just how you like 'em!" He leered. 

The perv just rocked back on his heels, tilting his head to the side. Nathan glared at him half-heartedly for a few seconds before sighing in defeat. 

"Oh get on with it then."

"Get on with what?" The kid looked confused, and Nathan could've sworn that his accent was a bit different, harder on the vowels.

"Why molesting my innocent body 'course." He swooned, placing a hand on his heart before he snorted, collapsing onto his back and spreading his arms wide on the dirt. "How the fuck should I know, can't read minds, can I?"

He let his eyelids drop, but kept them open just enough so that he could see the outline of the other boy's shadow as he dropped beside him. 

The question was asked with a quietly assertive air. 

"What's wrong?"

Nathan would normally respond with a filthy, obnoxious, fucking brilliant response, his specialty, but the stress of the past few days culminated into a hysterical laugh. 

"What the fuck isn't wrong! I'm a fucking homeless! A homeless. Me mum kicked me out for a complete tosser, her own boy even! I've got nowhere to go, my so called mates, the rotten bastards, all seem otherwise occupied." He sighed dramatically and let his head fall to the side, cheek pressed into the gravel.

"No birds to warm me nest. It's a hard life I tell you."

The perv was quiet for awhile, and so still that Nathan could easily forget he was there, until he said -"You could stay at the community center."

Nathan looked at him, squinting against the sun, "What?" 

"The community center, no one is there at night." 

Nathan suddenly leaped up, laughing "Oi, that's fucking right! The community center! Oh, you clever bastard, I could just kiss you!" He leaned down, seeing the other boy's wide eyes darken, before he pulled back and grinned. "But I won't of course, wouldn't want to tarnish that whole pure as driven snow stalker vibe you've got going for ya'." 

He swung his bag up to his shoulder as he turned to go his merry way, but something made him pause, and in a moment of seriousness, he glanced over his shoulder, looking at the stunned boy who was still sitting on the side of the road.

"What was your name again? 'S' something? Syria, Sherry, Shalom?" 

The other boy's lips quirked up at the edges and for a moment he looked content to stare up at Nathan, a curious expression in his blue eyes. 

"My name is Barry."

~

It took Nathan awhile to realize that when the other poor sods were talking about some bloke called Simon, they meant Barry. He took this all in stride and assumed it was some sort of kinky sex game, and proceeded to leer at the other boy in the halls of the center, calling him Barry and wondering what his name actually was. 

He swore, this was more complicated than wooing any bird. Sometimes Barry ran hot, sometimes he ran cold. Nathan could remember some nights when Barry would appear at the center just as he was getting a might bit lonely, not that he'd ever admit it, mind, and he'd sit on the edge of Nathan's meager padding he called a bed and listen to his insults with a quiet smile and a gentle prod. 

Eventually, Nathan began to be gentle back, his insults losing their malice.

Not that he ever showed it in the day. He'd be fucking mad to, with a pack like them around to tease him. But despite that, when he thought it safe to, he'd give Barry a grin from across the room, watch the confusion wash across his face, like he didn't remember their needlessly whispered conversation the night before. He couldn't help but get a bit offended and his remarks would become a bit more vicious, watching as the cautious openness on the other boy's face closed off, becoming cold. 

Then at night, Barry would come back and he'd be soft and Nathan imagine he'd be rather warm if he ever let Nathan get a hand on him. 

In retrospect, it made a lot more sense now why Barry had always shied away from his touch, despite his shy grins and cautious flirting. 

But none of it truly hit him until after the whole Vince fiasco. 

He could still remember everything, but what stuck out the most in his mind was the night when Barry was sitting next to him, colder than he'd ever been at night, rolling the bottle of beer between his hands, not reciprocating Nathan's advances. Not that he'd ever let Nathan molest him like that normally, but usually he'd chide Nathan with a quiet, surprisingly witty comment and distract him, putting things off for a later time. Never outright rejection, never fear. 

As Barry was fleeing from him, leaving his heart breaking, Nathan could've sworn that he saw a flash of the other boy, staring at him sadly as his double ran past him.

~

When it all came together, and when it all fell apart, Nathan was laying on his mattress, staring morosely at the wall. Barry was pacing up and down the walkway, not saying anything. Nathan sighed. 

"I know you like me, Barry, I mean who could resist this piece of lush?" He gestured down his body, half covered by a blanket as he gave the other boy a wide grin, cracked at the edges. 

Barry stopped to stare at him with those wide blue eyes; warm with an emotion Nathan had never seen before when someone looked at him. Affection, maybe. Maybe something more.

"I do like you Nathan, believe me, I do." 

Nathan pulled himself into a sitting position, leaning forward so his elbows were resting on his knees. He tried not to look as frustrated as he felt. 

"Why can't we have it on then? I don't do all this tentative shit. If you like me, and I like ya', why don't you ever let me touch you?"

Nathan saw Barry swallow, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he took an aborted step forward.

"I -"

"Nathan, who're you talking to?"

Nathan jerked, staring at Barry incredulously, or, the clone of Barry, standing at the top of the stairs, looking at him with those cold closed off eyes. He jerked his head to look at Barry who was gazing at him with a hopeless expression, hand reached out and face caught in a mask of fear and desperation.

He stood abruptly, seeing the Barry clone flinch back before standing his ground, eyes curious now. 

He took a step forward, swallowing painfully, staring between the two boys. One who couldn't be touched, couldn't be felt, couldn't be heard by anyone other than Nathan. 

One who moved away from his touches not because he couldn't have them, but because he didn't want them. One that could be heard but didn't want to listen. Not to Nathan anyways. 

It took all his bravado; only the desperate need to know driving him to say in a painfully rough voice.

"What's your name?" He asked, darting his gaze to the boy, the one who looked like Barry but was alive and whole but who didn't give Nathan soft smiles and gentle words.

He saw genuine confusion wrinkle the boy's brow, and out of the corner of his eye he could see Barry's hand fall back to his side, his form seeming to waver in the weak light of the setting sun. 

"Simon. My name is Simon."


End file.
